Variant Zombies

Shooter Zombies


Many zombies have first hand knowledge of projectile weapons; guns, crossbows, flamethrowers, javelins, vinyl records and anything else that can be projected at high velocity. Sadly it is generally on the receiving end of said projectiles.

Equipping zombies with guns would certainly come as a surprise to those drunken yobbos who are so used to blazing away at poor zombies shambling towards them. Hah, I’d like to see the expression on their face when a zombie pops up and blasts them away.

Word of advice; if you do plan to shoot a hunter, don’t shoot the brain.

Surprisingly, a hunter’s brain is quite tasty. They come pre-marinated, the hunter having soused himself on hard-liqueur previously, and there is a strong taste due to a diet rich in red meats.

Zombies have a number of advantages when it comes to using guns. They don’t need to sleep, eat or breath and so make excellent snipers. The downside of course is poor eyesight, a tendency for the kick of the gun to rip an arm off and the habit of scavengers coming along and doing away with your leg while you are patiently waiting for a victim. There is nothing more embarrassing than having to hop after a dog who has taken off down the street with your leg in its mouth.


~ by qorvus on August 31, 2009.

One Response to “Variant Zombies”

  1. Hi! We are the team of the Ou Zombie’s blog. The Zombie Survival Guide. Contact us if you want survival.

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